Dava Krause is an Identity Staff Writer, but a comedian first. She has dedicated her time to provide Identity readers with some laughter in their lives. We don’t always have to be serious, so unwind with a laugh from time to time with Dava and Identity.
Well readers it’s been a long time. Did you miss me? No? Well I didn’t miss you either. So there. Kidding! Since I’ve written a post here at Identity major things have happened.
My husband had been looking for an opportunity to advance his career in Los Angeles for some time with no luck. At the end of July, he got a job offer in NY. We were scared, excited and scared. Did I say scared? Should we move to NY?
After many long discussions/arguments driven by anxiety/ over the course of a short week (the folks in NY needed an answer asap) we decided he should take the plunge. Hubs and I were both raised on the East Coast (him in NJ and me in Philly) and we thought it might be nice to move back even if it were for a few years. Or at the very minimum — since a lease was involved- a year. We could do a year anywhere, right?
I flew out to New York to find us an apartment, which was no easy task. Apparently the fact we had two cats and a dog was a problem. Never mind that my dog is a Chihuahua and the combined weight of my pets was less than thirty pounds. Most places just wouldn’t take us. One place asked to have a Skype interview with my dog. To check out his personality. What could you possibly access from a Skype interview with a dog? What were they gonna say, “Your Chihuahua seems nice, but we spoke with a schnauzer earlier today who really seemed on top of his shit.”
I finally found a place and when I flew back to Los Angeles we broke the news to our friends. A lot of them were supportive. “What an adventure,” one friend said. And “Everyone should live in NY at some point in their lives,” another friend assured me. These were kind neutral things to say to someone who has already MADE A DECISION TO MOVE. Yeah. The decision was made. I was just letting them know. It was not, as some viewed it, a time to share their opinions about it. Oh, and did they have opinions.
“Uch, I couldn’t do it. I don’t know. I think you’ll hate it.” Now, readers, it’s not like I had never been to New York before. Hell, I even lived in a dorm at NYU for two summers in college. But that was so long ago. I was in my twenties. Maybe I would hate it.
Then of course there were people that told me how much I’d love it. “Uch. I’d love to move out of Los Angeles if I could. You’re gonna be so much happier there.” Jeez. I didn’t think I was necessarily unhappy here.
And of course, almost every day since I’ve been in New York, I’ve had people offer me their opinions about Los Angeles. New Yorkers are funny that way. Adamantly declaring their city is the only place worth living on Earth. “Do you love living in New York,” one of my native New Yorker friends asked me. “Isn’t it so much better than LA?” I mean — in some ways. But do I love it? I enjoy not driving. It’s cool to be in a brand new neighborhood with all sorts of new restaurants and stores to explore. I’ve met an entirely different community of comedians. But it has its drawbacks. It’s cold. Sometimes I miss driving.
New Yorkers love to tell you how fake Los Angeles is. They love to ask you how you could possibly deal with all the plastic Hollywood personalities and meaningless conversations. What, because every time I buy a carton of milk at my local bodega we discuss philosophy? Because when I’m waiting on the subway platform I often discuss deep and meaningful moments in my life with a complete stranger? It’s a ludacris thing to say that an entirety of a city is comprised of a certain type of people. That sounds like the setting of a science fiction movie. The fact is that Los Angeles is a huge city filled with fake, judgmental, snobby people. But so is New York. That’s right. There are assholes everywhere. There are also kind, funny, wonderful people everywhere. You just have to look.
So do I love it here? No. But I don’t hate it either. I’m doing okay. Just like I did in Los Angeles. And the older I get, the more I realize that life isn’t black and white. I have good days and bad days. You know. Like most people. Unless you’re a robot.
Identity Magazine is all about empowering women to get all A’s in the game of life — Accept. Appreciate. Achieve.TM Every contributor and expert answer the Identity 5 questions in keeping with our theme. As a team, we hope to inspire and motivate ourselves and inspire you to get all A’s.
What have you accepted in your life that took time, physically or mentally?
That I will never be a size 0 and that it’s okay because beauty comes in a variety of shapes, sizes and colors. That beauty comes from confidence in what you have and who you are and not in what is measured in beauty magazines.
What do you appreciate about yourself and within your life?
I appreciate my tenacity. I have dreams and I won’t give them up! I also appreciate my husband, my family and friends and my health. Those are all the most important things.
What is one of your most rewarding achievements in life? What goals do you still have?
I never thought I could be a Spinning instructor and I am. I still continue to push myself to be more active.
What is your not-so-perfect way? What imperfections and quirks create your Identity?
I am sarcastic and see the humor in everything. Some people don’t appreciate it but you have to go where you are celebrated not tolerated.
How would you complete the phrase “I Love My…?”
feet. they’re really cute.