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Take Your Selfie to a Deeper Level

All About Acceptance, Appreciation, and Achieving
Susan Vernicek
Written by Susan Vernicek

I’m sick and tired of reading and seeing all the physical images of our identities. Much of the media out there is still focusing on our outer beauty, as if our surface still defines our identity. How many times can we share images of a variety of women who come in all sizes when it’s NOT about our physical appearance? How do we dig deeper?

I’m sick and tired of reading and seeing all the physical images of our identities. Much of the media out there is still focusing on our outer beauty, as if our surface still defines our identity. How many times can we share images of a variety of women who come in all sizes when it’s NOT about our physical appearance? How do we dig deeper?

We all know that selfies have been a staple in our media for a few years now. The term selfie was defined on UrbanDictotionary.com in 2005. According to Media Bistro, millions of selfies are shared each and every day across all the major social media platforms. According to data from Samsung, selfies make up almost one-third of all photos taken by people ages 18-24, with Facebook, WhatsApp, Twitter, Instagram and Snapchat bearing the brunt of that load.

Some consider those who take selfies as self-absorbed individuals and others think selfies are a way that individuals express who they are—their identities.

Why do you take and share a selfie? Is it for attention? To build confidence? To build a brand or to entertain? To express? Or to simply and authentically keep your friends, family, and fans up to date on what’s going on in your life?

I surveyed hundreds of women, and some say that the motivation behind their selfie is to motivate and inspire others by showing how great their life is and to show that you too can do and have anything you want. I understand and support that belief, but are some of these selfie actions a little vain as well—maybe unconsciously? Why can’t we show and express our vulnerable times as well? Wouldn’t that resonate just as much with others because we wouldn’t feel so alone when we have challenging times?

To be frank, I have unfollowed some friends and business colleagues after months of hearing only the good in their life and business and never hearing about their challenges. Maybe you’re thinking, “somebody is jealous or has #fbjealousy.” I’m not jealous; I just prefer to stay connected with those who share the good and the bad. I’m not saying you should air dirty laundry on social media—there are boundaries. Nobody goes through life without challenges—and that’s a fact. Our challenges and obstacles may never be the same, but we each experience them and we can each learn and support one another.

My question is, why do we limit our self-expressions to a physical selfie when we are blessed human beings with layers upon layers of character and personality that create our identities? I know it’s an easier sell, an easier connection, and easier marketing tactic, but can we work on taking the selfie to a deeper level? Can we reveal what lies beneath the physical selfie?

According to an article on Time, Dr. Pamela Rutledge, director of the Media Psychology Research Center, believes that parents and experts are over-analyzing the selfie. I’m not trying to over-analyze the selfie, but I believe the media and many bloggers/writers are still focusing and promoting too much on physical appearance and body image.

I’m sick and tired of reading and seeing all the physical images of our identities. Much of the media out there is still focusing on our outer beauty, as if our surface still defines our identity. How many times can we share images of a variety of women who come in all sizes when it’s NOT about our physical appearance? How do we dig deeper?

Why do we have to use the term “plus-size model?” Get rid of this ridiculous label altogether. Why are we still writing articles about women who have achieved wearing a bikini for the first time? It’s not that I don’t support their achievement and success on building confidence, but again, we are still focusing on the physical body image. When can we stop these conversations because they no longer need to be a conversation? She’s a model, not a “plus- size model.” Or she’s a model for Express and she’s a model for Lane Bryant, etc. She’s a model, plain and simple.

We are more than our physical appearance. We have numerous layers to our identities, but yet we don’t express them, especially the layers of our vulnerabilities.

That’s why I created Identity. Identity is about expressing your entire identity—inside—out. Our identities are created by layer, after layer, after layer. We are complex individuals just like a butterfly. Like our own identities, a butterfly morphs through many stages and layers during its lifetime.

The changes we face day in and day out help shape our identities into the multiple layers that make us who we are. Our identities are made up of our physical, mental, and spiritual selves, as well as our hobbies, religious beliefs, education, intelligence, and unique viewpoints.

Embrace the belief that our identities run far deeper than what can be seen on the surface. Some identities are more spiritual, more religious, fit, intelligent, curious, shy, outgoing or ambitious.

Love My Layers

The Identity Movement – #LoveMyLayers

For seven years, Identity has been a leader in the online world for teaching and showing women how to shift their thinking from thoughts of criticizing their minds and bodies, to learning about what true self-love and acceptance really means. To date, we have touched 800,000 women and with your help—together we can reach 1 Million!

The layers that define us are many and varied. Join the #LoveMyLayers movement which illustrates our numerous layers, found well-beyond what others see on the surface. Share your layers in selfies with a purpose. Post a picture of yourself and share something unique about what makes you, you, and help inspire women to love all the beautiful layers that make up their identities! Reality is, selfies are here to stay, so let’s take the selfie to the next level.

Identity Magazine is all about empowering women to get all A’s in the game of life – Accept. Appreciate. Achieve.™ Every contributor and expert answer the Identity 5 questions in keeping with our theme. As a team, we hope to inspire and motivate ourselves and inspire you to get all A’s.

What have you accepted within your life, physically and/or mentally? What are you still working on accepting?

I’ve accepted and have learned to own my entire being. From my outer shell down to my soul I accept what I have and when I don’t like something, I fix it. It may take awhile for me to take action, but I eventually take action. I’m working on making the “take action” part quicker.  I tend to fight my intuition and inner voice, so my goal is to learn to accept my initial thoughts, my gut reactions and act as quickly as I can.

What have you learn to appreciate about yourself and/or within your life, physically and mentally? What are you still working on to appreciate?

I appreciate every single layer that creates my identity—and oh boy, there are many!

What is one of your most rewarding achievements in life? What makes YOU most proud? What goals and dreams do you still have?

Finally writing this article. I’ve had this thought and movement that I wanted to share, but it took awhile because of fear.  I have so many thoughts about body image and all the amazing articles in media today, but our articles seem to still be focusing on the physical. I didn’t know how this article would come out. I think overall I am proud of it and hope it sparks conversation and women expressing their layers through selfies.

We all have imperfections, so we think. The truth—we are all perfectly imperfect. What are your not-so-perfect ways? What imperfections and quirks create who you are—your Identity?

I’m too agreeing.  I am able to see and understand the opinions and beliefs of everybody else, that I never really can debate. I would make a horrible lawyer.  I love hearing  what everybody else believes in with religion, politics, and anything else. I find it fascinating how unique our thoughts are.

Love My Layers“I Love My…” is an outlet for you to express and appreciate all the positive traits that make you…well… YOU! Sharing what you love about yourself will make you smile, feel empowered, and uplift your spirit and soul. (we assure you!)

Identity challenges you to complete the phrase “I Love My…?

I love my layers, every single layer! I love that I’m a mom, a sister, a daughter, an aunt, a wife, free spirited. I love that I love to dance, I love coffee, I love happy hours, I love drinking during the day with friends, I love concerts and parties, I love to eat and I love to gamble! These are just a FEW layers…

About the author

Susan Vernicek

Susan Vernicek

Facts about Susan Vernicek:
• She’s happily married and a mother of 3.5 year old twins.

• She’s tried almost every fad diet back in her quick-fix days, admits at age 36 it’s a struggle to work hard on overall balance and is focused on not giving into the unhealthy fads we see daily.

• She’s all natural with natural blonde hair, uneven breasts, a bigger nose, and full of curves that she learns to appreciate more and more each day.

• She had a career where part of her job was staring at herself 40 hours a week manipulating her very own face as well as others.

• She’s the youngest of 7, ranging from 36-55+, an Aunt, Great Aunt and even younger than some of her nieces and nephews!

• She’s traveled and seen over 8 countries and spent a summer in London finding her passion and embracing life.

• She created S&J Identity, Inc. AKA IdentityMagazine.net, having no business background and at the age of 25.

•She's a certified Holistic Health Coach and Diamond BeachBody Coach

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