The Upside of Anger

“Screaming Woman” by David Castillo Dominici
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Written by Lorna Anne

Some of the most compelling evolutionary changes in life come from an unexpected source—anger! How can you use it to your advantage?

Some of the most compelling evolutionary changes in life come from an unexpected source–anger! How can you use it to your advantage?

There are times in life when we are challenged beyond our capacity, our knowledge, or our conviction within ourselves. We either willingly take up, or, are circumstantially given, tasks that go beyond our scope.

After assessing the situation realistically, our first reaction might well be, “I can’t do that!” But then the necessity of the pressing need to complete the task propels us forward. For, if we back out, it would be a disadvantage to ourselves and to others.

The initial state of mind when we realize that we must conquer something akin to climbing Mt. Everest, is despair, once we deny that success is possible. We become victims of our inability to cope.

We imagine how difficult it will be, or how it will affect us negatively, curtailing or diminishing our lives in some way; even though the final reward, after all our toil, will yield beneficial results.

The second stage of our process is to decide to push forward with our final achievement in mind, despite the gloom and foreboding.

For those of us who have the choice to back out, versus those who don’t (fighting disease, or cleaning up after natural disasters, for example), the exit door is certainly appealing if we should crumble in our new conviction. But in either case, though the job at hand is overwhelming, we “roll up our sleeves” and begin with as much positive attitude as we can muster.

This second stage is where we see whether the task is easier or harder than expected. For those who find it easier, so much the better. Carry on!

For those of us who see hidden blocks and obstacles we never dreamed existed, making things even harder, we reach a point of having to make a choice. Do we trust our eventual success and support the task, or do we give up and lose what would be gained if we could only forbear and succeed!

As frustration mounts, and the climb becomes more difficult, problems seem insurmountable, and progress comes to a grinding halt. Do we run for the exit door, not caring about the detrimental consequences of quitting?

We just want release from our dilemma. “There is no way I can do this!” screams a deep angry voice within. That is the voice of fear speaking. It is an irrational fear because if we desire something or are given an unexpected reality from the Universe, in either instance, we need to realize that we aren’t given anything that we are not able to do successfully. The anger over the situation can be used to our advantage. This is the third stage. It is actually a step forward and healthier than being a victim. Why? Because the anger which is caused by fear of failure can be transmuted to passion, and passion into determination to achieve.

Released anger helps us vent and stay present in the moment, rather than running for the door. At the moment of indecision, when we choose determination rather than evacuation, we own believing we can do it unconditionally. We move into a support position for ourselves as doers.

The anger can now fuel the desire. It is the energy that compels us to leap over the obstacles in our way. It gives us strength to go on. With this new willful vehemence to overcome the difficulties, amazingly, obstacles will ease up and progress will begin again. This has been proven time and again: walk through the fear.

Anger is energy. We just need to transform it into the will to conquer rather than let fear conquer our wills.

Anger is the catalyst which can help us fortify conviction within ourselves– that we can do what we didn’t think we could!

It is at those times, when we choose to remain true to our path, through sheer angry determinism, that we exceed ourselves.

Identity Magazine is all about empowering women to get all A’s in the game of life — Accept. Appreciate. Achieve.TM Every contributor and expert answer the Identity 5 questions in keeping with our theme. As a team, we hope to inspire and motivate ourselves and inspire you to get all A’s.

What have you accepted within your life, physically and/or mentally? What are you still working on accepting?

I’ve accepted the need for determination to overcome obstacles.

What have you learn to appreciate about yourself and/or within your life, physically and mentally? What are you still working on to appreciate?

I appreciate my spiritual view of the world as a place to learn our lessons.

What is one of your most rewarding achievements in life? What makes YOU most proud? What goals and dreams do you still have?

Writing and learning are most important. I would like to expand readership.

We all have imperfections, so we think. The truth–we are all perfectly imperfect. What are your not-so-perfect ways? What imperfections and quirks create who you are–your Identity?

I need to learn more patience with ignorance.

“I Love My…” is an outlet for you to express and appreciate all the positive traits that make you…well… YOU! Sharing what you love about yourself will make you smile, feel empowered, and uplift your spirit and soul. (we assure you!)

I love my spiritual path of teaching and leading myself and others to happy, fulfilled, loving lives.

Identity challenges you to complete the phrase “I Love My…?

About the author

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Lorna Anne

Lorna Anne received a psychology degree from the University of New Hampshire. Much of her knowledge comes from her own private esoteric studies of ancient documents of wisdom. She has been a practicing counselor for more than 20 years in New Orleans, Honolulu, and Washington state where she spent several years studying dream interpretation with a Jungian therapist. She currently resides in Chatham, Ma, and counsels either in person or on the phone. For inquiries, please contact Lorna via E-mail at, or on Face book a

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