Is that Fear?

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Written by Lorna Anne

Fear is tricky to determine whether it is a sense of danger from an external reality, or a hypothetical thought just inside our heads.

Is there a difference between rational caution and irrational fear? How do you tell the difference between the two? Here’s a test to help you find out.


Resistance, tension, worry and fear — the four big symptoms of stress. The easiest definition for stress is confrontation with the Unknown. We stress because we are uncertain of outcomes, and that uncertainty brings up the above four reactions. Stress may be unnecessary if we have fears not grounded in realistic probabilities.

Resistance is a good example. It is when our feelings oppose or go against something because our initial perception is repugnance or revulsion. If those reactions are based upon what might happen, that is, outcomes that one doesn’t want, then it is best to see this resistance as a cautionary warning to take action to prevent what one resists from happening. If our resistance is based in the reality itself, such as an immediate reaction to a person or place, then it helps us to steer clear of things that are not beneficial to us. But, if we resist positive feelings because we’re afraid we’ll be let down because things won’t go as we hope or desire, then you have just moved into irrational fear. It is a resistance to allowing ourselves to get excited and make a positive connection to some wish or desire. Remember, it is not smart to be negative and shut out positive possibilities. Like attracts like…

Tension is the product of unconscious conflict in our focus on our choices. Making choices always involves unknown variables and outcomes. Do we assess the positives and negatives of any future choices we need to make? Are those projected outcomes we foresee as the result of our choices bringing up tangible difficulties that we must take caution about and overcome, or are our projections merely figments of an irrational fearful imagination?

Worry is anxiety over the unknown future. For instance: “Will I pass the test?” “Will I make it home safely?” We can frazzle ourselves into incapacitating anxiety which can actually manifest in physical symptoms. However, there can be proactive worry that doesn’t debilitate the system. Positive worry is a contribution of emotional and psychic support directed toward belief in the positive outcome. Why worry when you really don’t have grounds to, unless you are irrationally predicting disaster rather than helping the energies move in positive ways?

Fear is tricky to determine whether it is a sense of danger from an external reality, or a hypothetical thought just inside our heads. If we sense danger, then we must address the fear. If it is the latter type, then we must use our willpower to do the thing we fear and walk through it, exorcise it from our minds and move forward.

Below are 5 situations in which you must determine caution from fear. Choose either A or B depending on what you think the best course of action should be:
1) It is not cold outdoors, however, you get caught in a downpour unexpectedly and you do not have protective rain gear. You are just recovering from a nasty cold. Do you:
A) Take extra Vitamin C or gargle to prevent a relapse
B) Trust that you’ll be okay, since you’ve just been sick
2) An item that you have waned to purchase for a long time is on sale. You wonder whether you should use the money you were saving for a future emergency. Do you or not?
A) Yes
B) No
3) You want to go hiking with friends. You have a recent injury that is healing, but is still a bit tender. Do you go anyway and hope for the best?
A) Yes
B) No
4) You have a definite attraction to someone. They do not know you like them. Do you tell them of your feelings?
A) Yes
B) No
5) You wake up with a bad cold. Do you go to work because you are afraid if you miss a day you may not be able to make monthly bills. Do you:
A) Go into work anyway, even though you feel wretched
B) Stay home and take care of yourself

Answers:
1) A — Best to take precautionary measures because the reality is one in which circumstances could cause a relapse.
2) A — You give yourself what will make you happy and you trust the money will not be needed until you can save up again.
3) B — The mountain will be there. Nurturing and caring for your well being is of primary importance.
4) A — Emotional expression of one’s needs and desires is healthy. If nothing is said, you may never know that they, too, feel the same way; and if not, then you can move on and realize there’s someone better out there for you.
5) B — If you protect others from illness, because this is right, you will be protected. The money will come from somewhere. The Universe will provide for those who show caring.

Identity Magazine is all about empowering women to get all A’s in the game of life — Accept. Appreciate. Achieve.TM Every contributor and expert answer the Identity 5 questions in keeping with our theme. As a team, we hope to inspire and motivate ourselves and inspire you to get all A’s.

What have you accepted within your life, physically and/or mentally? What are you still working on accepting?

I have accepted that the harder you work, the luckier you get.

What have you learn to appreciate about yourself and/or within your life, physically and mentally? What are you still working on to appreciate?

I appreciate that I’ve learned patience.

What is one of your most rewarding achievements in life? What makes YOU most proud? What goals and dreams do you still have?

Overcoming shyness as a child and becoming outspoken.

We all have imperfections, so we think. The truth–we are all perfectly imperfect. What are your not-so-perfect ways? What imperfections and quirks create who you are–your Identity?

I value my need to remain an independent entity in relationships. I’m not always obliging.

“I Love My…” is an outlet for you to express and appreciate all the positive traits that make you…well… YOU! Sharing what you love about yourself will make you smile, feel empowered, and uplift your spirit and soul. (we assure you!)

Identity challenges you to complete the phrase “I Love My…?

I love my evolution to becoming me.

About the author

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Lorna Anne

Lorna Anne received a psychology degree from the University of New Hampshire. Much of her knowledge comes from her own private esoteric studies of ancient documents of wisdom. She has been a practicing counselor for more than 20 years in New Orleans, Honolulu, and Washington state where she spent several years studying dream interpretation with a Jungian therapist. She currently resides in Chatham, Ma, and counsels either in person or on the phone. For inquiries, please contact Lorna via E-mail at Wiselorna@ymail.com, or on Face book a http://www.facebook.com/lornaanne.marvinny.

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