5 Relationship Principles I Learned While On Vacation

Written by Beate Chelette

Beate Chelette shares one villa with 18 strangers in a foreign country. What happens by the end of the week is nothing short of spectacular. Beate shares the lessons she learned in the Dominican Republic that can be applied to all our personal and professional relationships.

I recently went on vacation in the Dominican Republic. Of the 20 people who shared the 10-bedroom villa, I knew only one of them before I got there. Not my usual sort of scene, way more people than I tend to travel with, and a bit nerve-wracking if you ask me!


Would we get along? Would there be drama? Would this vacation be the rejuvenation I needed, or would I be the same old stressed out me in a tropical country?

Now that I’m home, I can’t think of one thing that could have gone better. All 20 of us got along swimmingly–which is no easy feat when you consider the many different personalities that were thrown together under one roof.

Was there a pattern that we can learn from and apply to our professional relationships?

A key to our good times was that we had one common goal: relaxation. We all wanted to escape our regular lives, enjoy a stress-free week, let our hair down a little (or a lot), and do what makes us happy. Other than the basics of being polite and cleaning up after ourselves, there were no expectations about how to act or behave.

We made our own schedules and individually did what we wanted, when we wanted. Every day, small groups formed to take long walks on our deserted beach, go kayaking, or visit the small nearby community for lunch or a drink. These opportunities for one-on-one conversations helped us get to know one another much better.

Every experience provides an opportunity for learning, and this vacation was no exception. Here are the five relationship principles that worked for 20 strangers and how you can apply them in your businesses relationships.

  1. Relationships work when there is no pre-conceived notion of what the other person will provide. When we can be who we naturally are, we are not wearing a ‘mask.’ This allows others to see our true and authentic selves from the get-go.
  2. When we don’t have an agenda to form relationships solely for the sake of our future advancements, we simply look for a personal connection. We make a choice to hang out with someone because we like him or her.
  3. We invite the people who interest us into our circle and control how much or how little time we want to spend with them. It’s easy.
  4. Regardless of our innate preferences, or whether we are introverts or extroverts, we are not judged and are free to watch and/or participate. If an activity doesn’t suit us, we can say no. If the idea suddenly sounds great, we can change our minds and be applauded for it.
  5. We learn quickly through observation what others like or dislike. We don’t worry about our differences because we look for ways to connect instead. This allows us to see the best in everyone.

When you look at the five relationship principles I learned on my vacation, you’ll see much of it is about creating an environment without expectations to be anything but ourselves. Based on that, we build on each other’s strengths versus tearing each other down for being different.

How will you use these principles in your personal and professional relationships?

Identity Magazine is all about empowering women to get all A’s in the game of life — Accept. Appreciate. Achieve.TM Every contributor and expert answer the Identity 5 questions in keeping with our theme. As a team, we hope to inspire and motivate ourselves and inspire you to get all A’s.

1. What have you accepted within your life, physically and/or mentally? What are you still working on accepting?

I love socializing. But, even the most social person needs down time to recharge.

I find it difficult to tell those closest around me when I need to take care of myself because I feel like I disappoint them.

2. What have you learned to appreciate about yourself and/or within your life, physically and mentally? What are you still working on to appreciate?

The work I do is impossible to accomplish in a vacuum, so I appreciate that my team  welcomes me into their professional lives, even supporting me personally,  enabling us to go further together.

3. What is one of your most rewarding achievements in life? What makes YOU most proud? What goals and dreams do you still have?

I want The Women’s Code to be a truly global movement because sisterhood knows no borders! Let’s shout collaboration from the roof tops together!

4. We all have imperfections, so we think. The truth–we are all perfectly imperfect. What are your not-so-perfect ways? What imperfections and quirks create who you are–your Identity?

Chocolate. Need I say more?

5. “I Love My…” is an outlet for you to express and appreciate all the positive traits that make you…well… YOU! Sharing what you love about yourself will make you smile, feel empowered, and uplift your spirit and soul. (we assure you!)

 Identity challenges you to complete the phrase “I Love My…?”

…friends–new and old, far and wide. They bring me joy, encouragement, and a reason to keep moving forward with The Women’s Code.

About the author

Beate Chelette

At heart, I’m an entrepreneur and I’m at my best when coming up with ideas for new companies, polishing those ideas, and working with a team to implement them.
In the workplace, I have learned to overcome numerous obstacles including corporate treachery, sabotaging coworkers, and dysfunctional teams. I found ways to succeed in my professional life while my personal life fell apart. These are the experiences that now shape my coaching and consulting programs.
My latest passion is to help others through my programs. When I am not on the road sharing The Women’s Code, I work with private and corporate clients and assist them to build their businesses and train their teams.