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Top 7 Common Sabotaging Phrases

Top 7 Common Sabotaging Phrases
Nancy Stampah
Written by Nancy Stampah

If you keep listening to your negative, sabotaging thoughts, you will become a victim to a self-fulfilling prophecy of failure.

Have you been feeling re-energized and determined to improve your well-being or career? I hope so! But I am really wondering if you are still staying as focused and committed to your resolutions as you were over the past couple of months? Or, are the demands of our fast-paced society starting to take over and pushing your resolutions aside?

Now is the time to throw caution! It has been proven year after year, that by the end of January, many people tend to sabotage their success and fall back into old habit.   It takes 30 days to three months to change a habit. We are NOW in August…where do you stand?


To do this you must realize that you and no one else are holding you back from success and happiness. You are the only person responsible for the way you think and act towards people and situations.

The saddest fact is that most of the negative things we hear do not come from others, but come from the voice inside our very own scrutinizing heads. If you keep listening to your negative, sabotaging thoughts, you will become a victim to a self-fulfilling prophecy of failure.

Here are 7 Common Sabotaging Phrases:

1) “I do not have time.”
Positive Spin: “This is important for me. I will make time.”
2) “He, she or they need me.”
Positive Spin: “I need to take care of myself now. He, she or they need to grow and learn.”
3) “I am (afraid, stupid, fat, a failure, too old, etc.).”
Positive Spin: “I am (courageous, smart, beautiful, successful, young and spry, etc.).”
4) “I am not (smart, interesting, strong, etc.) enough.”
Positive Spin: “I am (smart, interesting, strong, etc.) enough.”
5) “I will be happy when X happens.”
Positive Spin: “I can no longer delay my happiness.”
6) “My life is getting out of control again.”
Positive Spin: “I am in control of my life, and I can handle it.”
7) “It is too hard.”

Positive Spin: “It will get easier.”
Start right now, by filling your mind with one of these positive thoughts. Write down the thought that is most relative to you and place it near your desk, bed, mirrors, cabinets, etc. Keep repeating your positive spin until it becomes a new habit of thought. Naturally, you will watch your self-fulfilling prophecy of success evolve. Repeat the steps for each new thought you want to master.

In addition, remember to surround yourself with positive people. When you surround yourself with positive people, you up your game. When you surround yourself with miserable, “oh-whoa-is-me”, negative people, there is a high probability you will turn out to be just like them.

DO NOT SETTLE for less than you deserve. You only have so much time left on this earth, enjoy the success and happiness you deserve before you no longer can.

Identity Magazine is all about empowering women to get all A’s in the game of life — Accept. Appreciate. Achieve.TM Every contributor and expert answer the Identity 5 questions in keeping with our theme. Their answers can be random and in the moment or they can be aligned with the above article. As a team, we hope to inspire and motivate ourselves and inspire you to get all A’s.

1. What have you accepted within your life, physically and/or mentally? What are you still working on accepting?

I have learned to not argue against reality by accepting, “It is what is.” With age and wisdom, I have minimized feeling disappointed by becoming less naive and realizing that while anything is possible, some people and some things will not change.

2. What have you learn to appreciate about yourself and/or within your life, physically and mentally? What are you still working on to appreciate?

I tend to say that I was born into inspiration. I appreciate all the blood, sweat and tears I have experienced over my 53 years. My tough childhood of growing up in a low-income, single-parent home with a mentally-challenged brother taught me to be grateful for what you have; to do what it takes to live a better life; and to treat all people with kindness and respect.

3. What is one of your most rewarding achievements in life? What makes YOU most proud? What goals and dreams do you still have?

Having dropped out of high school and earning a college degree when I was 35 years old was a tremendous achievement in my life. I can still feel the sense of pride. But the most rewarding achievement for me was the care and joy I gave my late mentally-challenged brother and the disadvantaged kids I have mentored. Nothing feels better than bringing joy, compassion and hope into someone’s life.

My long-term goal is expand my Life in Nancy’s Kitchen speaking and television platform so I can reach and empower more people to live a better life.

4. We all have imperfections, so we think. The truth–we are all perfectly imperfect. What are your not-so-perfect ways? What imperfections and quirks create who you are–your Identity?

As patient as I can be in interacting with people, I have such a sense of urgency to get things done. I perform better when I am busy and moving fast. When I am in a slow period, I struggle with maintaining momentum and discipline, which can keep me stuck for a bit. As for quirks, I sure am a silly, upbeat gal. Those who know me personally have to listen to me belly-laugh out loud at my own jokes and sing off key even when I do not know all the words. Ya gotta live a little, have some fun!

5. “I Love My…” is an outlet for you to express and appreciate all the positive traits that make you…well… YOU! Sharing what you love about yourself will make you smile, feel empowered, and uplift your spirit and soul. (we assure you!) Identity challenges you to complete the phrase “I Love My…?”

I love my career and love that I love to have fun!


Photo credit:
Jean Gerber

About the author

Nancy Stampah

Nancy Stampah

Nancy Stampahar is an inspirational catalyst for change. With a high school dropout past, to earning her BSBA college degree, Nancy knows what it what it takes to cook up a good life! An award-winning author and creator of high-energy videos that aired on The Rachael Ray Show and Oprah’s OWN network, Nancy’s most recent creation is the first empowerment-cooking show, Life in Nancy’s Kitchen, which will debut on MCA-TV February, 2014. Her new delicious, motivational video, Life Cooks! is feeding souls and nourishing lives. Nancy’s authentic and enthusiastic personality makes her one of today’s most dynamic women motivational speakers and workshop facilitators. As and author of the award-winning, personal growth book Peace, Love and Lemonade: A Recipe to Make Your Life Sweeter, with over 15 years public speaking, consulting and training experience, her professional knowledge, personal wisdom and zest for life have helped thousands of people achieve positive results. Nancy genuinely cares about empowering people to live great lives. True to being the recipient of the Joe Ott Award, her personal life of volunteerism, mentoring disadvantaged kids and love for her late mentally-challenged brother fills her heart and touches the lives of those in need of compassion and love

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